Who am I to judge?

Judgement can't be cured. It's not something that can just go away like mending from a past relationship or a bad grade on an exam. There is no getting over judgement and there never will be... or is there a way??

It is true, judgement will pretty much be a constant in life. However, It doesn't always have to be a negative type. I get it, it is super hard to be able to turn off that part of the brain and rid ourselves of the need to look at what another is either wearing, acting or talking like. It's ingrained into us as a society and that is how we make our decisions subconsciously.

We do have choices, like always there is usually a better choice than the other variable. There is a negative judgement, for example "I hate the way they talk, it is so high pitched and super annoying." Then there is the positive judgement, "I don't really like their tone, but I can go somewhere else if it is bothering me."

That may or may not have given you an idea at what I am getting to. It is the reality that there will always be something that bugs us in a situation. Whether it be a person, place, object, whatever. We have a decision to make it a positive or negative experience. I feel like taking the positive judgement promotes a better outcome for me and the other person.

If we take the example above, I get the benefit of not having to deal with the high pitch and annoying voice by removing myself. The other person gets the benefit of not feeling judged. Now, this may be hard in a group setting so we will rephrase that.

Negative Judgement (stays the same): "I hate the way they talk, it is so high pitched and super annoying."

Positive Judgement: "She may just be nervous in this group setting and as much as it is annoying they are pretty good at XYZ."

I hope this is making sense. I just really do not see any point in judging someone right from the get go and it happens a lot. I remember in high school that you were judged primarily on what clothes you wore and what you looked like on the outside. Nothing on the inside really mattered and I know this for a fact because the "popular kids" were absolute ass-holes. Excuse my language, but really. We need to realize that our assumptions and judgements are also a reflection of what we feel about ourselves as well. By comparing what we have to others it becomes an automatic and subconscious action.

It makes for so much depression and mental issues in not just children, but later on in life as adults too. I still carry so many of the hurtful looks and words that were thrown at me and thats what reinforces that this is okay in society. So what if they have more shoes than you, so what if they have prettier hair than you...there are tons of others that do as well. You know what others don't have, your unique personality and way of life.

I always say, this is easier said than done and it is. I have learned to truly look at every judgement my mind tries to make me think and change it into a moe positive outlook and statement. If the person or situation is truly a mess and negatives clouds the whole mood...then you have full right to have whatever judgement you want.

Just kidding, you always have a CHOICE in what you do, think, and value but it is so much better to have a positive way of looking at things because it becomes a habit in other parts of our life as well.

Do you feel you judge others or yourself more?

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  I judge others more.
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  MYSELF!